Ha

user: mordaunt0
My dad pulled the same stunt by suddenly announcing one day after kindergarten, that he had the car on remote control and produced a calculator.He'd type in the speed and the car would go exactly that fast and when he hit the off button it would turn off. I was young, impressionable and impressed and totally suckered.Then a few days later my mom had taken the car out grocery shopping, and I was just wandering around the house, when I saw my dad doing his taxes and using the calculator.He had some big number like 60000 on the calculator and I totally freaked. 'I was like dad stop!! mommy's in the car!! stop!! omg stop !!' he was totally confused and I was in tears I thought she was dead, in some hypersonic car accident. It was pretty crazy, I was trying to turn it off and he had no clue what was going on and had to stop me from screwing up the long series of calculations he was doing for deductions and stuff. I was pretty convinced he was trying to kill her by waiting so long to clear the calculator.I wasn't convinced she was ok till she came back with groceries. That was the longest 2 hours of my life :'(Damn you dad... you got me good.

Ha

A very orthodox Jewish father was talking to his son. 'Father', he said, 'I'd like to go to Israel. I have never been and I have been wanting to go for years.'The father decided to let his son go. A month later, his son calls and says, 'Father, I converted to Christianity and am going to Italy with my friends.'The father got extremely upset and went to his best friend, a rabbi, for advice. 'David', he asked, 'why did my son do this?' The rabbi replied, 'You know what? My son did the exact same thing! Next time I am in temple I will ask God.'The rabbi went to temple and prayed to God. 'God, my son went to Israel and became a Christian. Why did this happen?' God replied, 'You know what? My son did the same thing